Once again, I will leave in a few days to return to Asia for study, reflection, and retreat amongst the wisdom and healing traditions of these ancient cultures. This is my twelfth trip in about as many years.
The first few trips marked the beginning of my turn inward. It was not as easy then as it is now. I vividly recall sitting at the airport, awaiting an endless and exhausting flight to India. I remember asking myself over and over, “What am I doing here?” I’ve given up a good, well established, and lucrative career in medicine to follow an intangible path to an even more intangible inner life. But, I sensed there was “more to life,” and more to healing. It was a gnawing feeling that would not leave. It was a deep calling to discover the traditional way of the healer. Yet, there were lingering and troubling doubts. I imagined friends and colleagues pursuing their careers and lives, taking “pleasurable” vacations, and seemingly happy with life as it was. Why wasn’t that me? Was this an awful mistake I would soon come to regret? That’s how it often felt at the beginning of the inner path.
When I look back on those moments, I still cannot quite understand what sustained that effort. But over the years, gratitude has replaced fear and certainty has overcome doubt. There has been a slow and progressive return to the center of my being, to a serenity, understanding, and happiness previously unknown. There is now a budding experience inside that has begun to know and experience the essence of life, much as our ancestors described it. The ancient sages and healers, East and West, knew that the treasures of life arose only from a matured inner inner life, from spirit. Plato called this inner understanding the True, the Good, and the Beautiful. Aristotle called it Eudaimonia – the good life. In the Christian tradition it is called Eros and Agape. In the Oriental tradition it is called the Tao. In modern times we call it human flourishing. In reality, it is nameless.
I soon discovered that the busyness of my outer life had been a mistaken substitute for the loss of this inner possibility. As a result, as I slowly tasted the qualities of human flourishing, my outer life simultaneously contracted. No longer looking outside for what could only be found within, much of the busyness, needless entertainment, and distraction came to a natural end. Life began to slow in proportion to my growing inner stillness and natural contentment. A healing and wholing began to take hold of my life. And as this stabilized and grew my outer work as a healer changed as well
I now knew that all authentic and sustained healing must begin inside. Outer treatments and remedies are fine for biological disturbances. However, they cannot bring stress, distress, and suffering to an end. They cannot develop our capacity for the subtlest mind-body self-regulation. They cannot reveal to us an enduring source of peace and happiness. They cannot convey a wisdom that knows the essence of self and life. They cannot give rise to authentic compassion and love. They cannot break the chains of yesterday, which alone can guarantee a boundless and spacious freedom.
I am beginning to understand the meaning of the ancient Greek term for a healer “iatromantis” – coarsely defined as “divine healer.” I am beginning to understand what Aurobindo spoke of when he referred to the possibility of a “divine life on earth.” All of the great philosophies, religions, and healing traditions agree on this singular truth – the inner life is the sole basis, the fundamental foundation, for optimal health and human flourishing. Such a life is not measured by the state of our biology but rather, by the state-of our-being. Thus, human flourishing, is a permanent condition of optimal well-being that is immune to the adversities of life, including aging, disease, and death.
When entering medical school, I would have never imagined the path I would take to become part of the great tradition of healers. I would never have imagined that the first healing I participate in must be my own. I would never have imagined this journey would take me to the far reaches of the world to meet and learn from the wise ones who have given their lives to touch the truth of health and healing.
I have also discovered that we can each travel this inner journey in the midst of our daily lives, and perhaps that is the best way to join this path in modern times. After years of teaching individuals and groups the central elements of this path – study, reflection, and practice – it has become clear that we can begin and mature this process of self-education right here and right now. In fact, there is no better time or place. One needs the willingness to travel inside, the commitment to see it through, and the proper support and teachings. With that, certain progress can be made in our life as it is now.
As I go into retreat I take each of you with me. There can be no other way. We either awaken together or join each other in the sleep of habitual patterns and automated living. Together, we can lead the precious life bequeathed to us by our ancestors.
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