There is a story told in the East of a young child sitting on her mother’s lap with her face looking forward, away from mother. In great distress the child, is crying out “mother, mother.” Unable to see her mother she reaches out with confusion and distress. Upon hearing her despair her brother looks up from playing and points out to his young sister that she is sitting on her mother’s lap and all she has to do is turn around and she will immediately see her.
And so it is with our own lives. We spend our days looking outward, and as a result we cannot see our deepest self– a simple ordinary and untouched spacious awareness that is a wish-fulfilling gem, giving us all we seek in life. It’s so close that we miss it. So instead we ceaselessly search outside for what’s inside, because that’s the direction toward which culture has turned our mind. We’re disappointed, frustrated and feel empty-handed when we cannot find what we’re searching for in the outer world. Yet we continue to look outside, with more and more intensity, for what is already and always present within us. Perseverance is the name we give to this outer search for peace and happiness. Confusion would be a more accurate term.
What are we looking for that is symbolized in this tale as the child’s mother? It’s of course our essence our true self that we can no longer see because we’ve been turned away from it for such a long time ago. Why do we long for and seek this essence? Because, we need this essence that some call our deeper self, soul or spirit to live a life of truth, happiness, connection, and meaning. It animates and enlivens our life. It’s the great natural healing elixir.
If we didn’t already and always have this essence within us we would neither know it nor search for it. But we do know it. We know it’s there. We don’t know how to touch it. It’s the natural birthright of each and every one of us. Yet we’ve lost contact with our deepest self. Perhaps it was a broken intimacy in childhood which turned our gaze outward, the ceaseless pull of an outer-oriented materialistic culture, the mistaken and transient taste of happiness found in outer things, or perhaps it’s just an unfortunate mental misunderstanding that has become a habit.
Whatever the cause the result is the same. We remain in exile from what is most human about us. We remain in exile from our home, our mother, our source, our greatest gift. And we seek, desire, attach to and become addicted to an endless variety of false and inadequate outer substitutes that are offered as pacifiers by family, culture, and industry. As a result of this mistaken search we suffer – mind, body, and spirit. And we have no clear way out because the only way out is to turn inward. And what’s inside is so close that we can’t see it, so ever present that we forget it, so simple and ordinary that we cannot recognize it. It’s like our own face that’s right there, but without a mirror we can’t see it.
However, there are ways that allow us to catch a glimpse of what’s possible. For example, there are times that the veil drops and for a moment and we catch a taste. Perhaps it’s a moment of communion with nature, at the peak of athletic performance, in music or dance, in the joy of sexual union, or in the gap between two thoughts. In each of these experiences, for a brief moment we experience selflessness, complete peace and ease, total presence, wholeness, and oneness – the qualities s of our deeper self. For a brief moment we touch our essence, we regain our spiritual nature.
But it doesn’t last. It can’t. It’s not the real thing. It’s generated by outer and temporary stimuli – people, objects, or experiences. So it invariably dissipates, and usually quite quickly. Even worse, we mistake the messenger for the message. We seek more and more of what we mistakenly believe to be the source of this wondrous moment. And it’s this error that invariably consumes us with a ceaseless and unfulfilled outer reaching, desire, addiction, and suffering. The message is actually quite clear. We are capable of this profound richness, but the source of a true and enduring experience of a larger spiritual life is within, not without. Once we see it no effort is necessary. We simply need to look in the right place. It’s that simple. It’s too simple.
Where Do We Begin?
We begin by recognizing the truth that what we seek – an enduring happiness, peace, and love – can never be found outside of our self. Look at all your efforts. Look at your relationships, ambitions, achievements, material possessions, fame, pride and so on. Ask yourself, “Have these experiences, people, or objects ever brought me lasting happiness and peace?”
If happiness and peace was a permanent quality of outer things once we attained them we would be all set. But that’s not how it is. Once we think we’ve captured these in outer life they either lose their luster or begin to dissipate as sources of happiness and peace. So we need continuous upgrades or changes. It’s like being on a never-ending treadmill. It just doesn’t work. That’s why we wear out our body, mind and spirit. Until you get this truth you will not turn inward. You will keep chasing the railroad tracks hoping they will meet somewhere in the distance.
We turn inward when we let go of the illusion that what we’re seeking can be attained through outer experiences alone. Renunciation, an unpleasant word in the West, is not a great act of discipline and surrender. It’s a natural unfolding of truth that’s driven by repeated suffering, disillusionment, and endless frustration. We finally stop our self in our tracks and realize we’ve been heading in the wrong direction. We realize that there is no gold at the end of our journey, only the sadness and regret of a road poorly chosen. Hopefully, there’s enough time in life to turn towards the real gold. Hopefully we wake up to the truth before it’s too late. That’s how renunciation takes place.
Renunciation is not a disciplined denial but rather a natural result of the recognition that what we’re doing doesn’t work. It doesn’t take discipline. It takes distress and suffering. Distress and suffering, when deeply felt and considered wakes us from a deep slumber driven by mistaken habits. When we’ve come to the end of the wrong road that’s where our life, our second birth begins. If that’s where you are then read further. If not, place what follows on your desk and save it for the right moment – if you’re fortunate.
View, Path, and Fruition
So how do we take the inward journey? The great traditions inform of us about the basic elements of the return trip home. Each tradition has its own specificities and words but the signposts are similar. Once we turn away from the wrong direction and focus inward we begin the journey. The first step is gaining the correct view. The view is of critical importance. As we’ve seen already, if you have the wrong view, a wrong understanding – for example, you believe that happiness and peace are found outside of your self in experiences, objects and people – you will never get to where you want to go. It’s like taking a rode that goes north to get from New York to California.
If your compass is incorrect, all of your choices and actions will be mistaken. That’s why it’s critical to understand things correctly, to have an accurate understanding of self and life. Just as we must develop a certainty that past views are wrong, in order to change course we must similarly develop a certainty that the view we’re committing to is correct. Too many of us go about this by trial and error. If something doesn’t work we quickly try the next thing that comes along. That’s a long process. Wouldn’t it be best to sit back and carefully consider what’s the correct view, the correct understanding?
The View
So setting off on the right path is essential. This may require time, study, and reflection. I will tell you how I’ve done this in my own life. I’ve first read the great stories. There are many of them ranging from Homer’s 3000 year old trilogy The Oddessy to Von Escehenback’s Parsifal’s Grail Legend to the modern day writings of Somerset Maugham, James Joyce, and Joseph Campbell among many others. I’ve similarly read the words of the sages, particularly those who’ve founded the great spiritual traditions. And finally, I’ve looked to find and meet great and noble people of our own time who can serve as living examples of a well-lived life. It’s here from these great stories and great people that I’ve found an enduring truth, immeasurable inspiration and steady assurance that’s been consistently validated across culture and time by those who’ve walked the path toward full humanity.
Remarkably, although cloaked in diverse cultural or religious trappings, they all teach us the same thing. So what is this universal and timeless viewpoint, this description of the heights of human perfection? Here it is. There is an essence in each of us that can be called natural awareness, Christ nature, Buddha nature, Soul, Spirit, Atman. The Great Perfection, Satori, and a myriad of other names. It has so many names because once you touch it it’s nameless and wordless, so for convenience any name will do. What’s most important is to understand the nature of this experience that’s been given so many names.
To begin, it’s experienced as spacious like space, an open presence and being. Because this experience of open awareness is beyond the conceptual mind it’s not obstructed by ongoing mental activity – thoughts, feelings, and mental images. It’s completely open and boundless. It’s like a great field in which everything can rise and fall, an allowing space in which all of life can take place with an interconnected ease. That’s how it is – a deceptively simple lightness of being.
Living beyond the conceptual mind there are no comparisons, judgments, likes or dislikes, mental clutter, worry, anxiety, hope, fear, self-cherishing, disconnection, or suffering. All of these experiences are part of our mental life, our conceptual mind. What we experience when we arrive home is quite the opposite. We experience an ease, peace, and rest that is an innate characteristic of the mind beyond thoughts. And this natural and effortless peace and ease gives rise to feelings of contentment and happiness that similarly are innate to our deepest essence. Finally, there is a care and compassion that seamlessly unfolds from clarity and truth.
So our natural home is spacious, empty of any fixed experiences, transparent, open, and at the same time filled with the qualities noted above. Nothing is there and yet everything is possible. It’s the gap between two thoughts, those glimpses we’ve previously spoken of, and who we are beyond our intellectual life and fixed sense of “I.” No one can take it from us and we cannot lose it. We can only forget it. And that’s exactly what we do. So we do not have to create this home anew. It is already there. We only need to move away the obstructions to it and accommodate our self to this natural experience.
But this is not so easy to do as all of our life we’ve been habituated to leave this home and live in exile in an outer world that is neither informed nor anchored by our deepest self. So we need a process or method that can help as reveal and stabilize this natural home so it becomes our way of life. Then, our usual sense of “I” and life become instruments and servants of this greater sense of self where all goodness is found. Where the perfection of human life is found. We are not led by our intellectual mind but rather by our heart and soul. The way home is a path that begins with the correct view of what’s possible.
The Path
Although a clear vision is essential, it’s not sufficient. We must take practical and actual steps to realize this view and integrate it into our life through learning and practice. There are two ways of learning. The first is inferential learning or intellectual learning. The second is direct experience. They are both important. If we want to construct a house we need to learn how to do by taking classes and reading instructional materials. With this background we gain sufficient knowledge to start the building process. Then, we learn directly from the actual experience of construction. Intellectual understanding is necessary to get us going, but once we learn from direct experience it’s far less important.
Inner development is much the same. First, it’s necessary to understand certain things about the mind. We learn this from listening to teachers or reading books. We learn about the busy mind, the sill mind, and finally, about the fundamental nature of the mind. With this knowledge in hand we begin to practice what we’ve already learned and gain certainty through direct experience. When we see it directly and clearly for our self, a sort of “aha” experience, we no longer have to rely on the writings or words of others. We arrive it our own truth. The process is study, reflection, and practice. The first two are the foundation, intellectual learning, and the last, practice, is direct experience.
It’s not as if we study, reflect and then move on to practice, like it was a fixed sequence. It’s not like that. It’s a continuous process of clarifying and strengthening our view and understandings and then validating our new and upgraded understandings through practice. It is a lifelong practice of growth and development, of study, reflection, and practice that progressively expands and enhances our understanding, awareness, experience, and life.
Much as the microscope or other technological instruments are the central tools with which we investigate the natural world, meditation is the instrument or tool we use to investigate the nature of our mind and inner life. It’s the central practice tool. It would be an error to cloak the instrument of meditation in a variety of mystical or cultural ideas. It’s simply a neutral tool much like a microscope. The microscope is used to examine and penetrate the mysteries of the outer world and meditation is used to examine and penetrate the mysteries of the inner world. It is no more complicated or mysterious than that.
Meditation is new to many of us. So here is a brief description. There are two aspects of meditation. The first is calming the mind. The second is developing insight into the nature of the mind. First we must calm the mind and then we can observe and learn from it. That’s the sequence. We’re not accustomed to a calm mind. We’re accustomed to endless mental chatter. We consider a cluttered and busy mind to be normal even if we find it exhausting and stressful. Chasing after random thoughts, feelings, and mental images is the way of an untrained and unfocused mind. When our mind is occupied and cluttered by mental chatter it’s not possible to explore it. There is no space, clarity or openness in our busy mind. It’s taken over by mental chatter. We must properly prepare the mind so that it can be examined, understood, and optimally used in the same way we prepare a laboratory slide so we can correctly view it, or prepare the body for a proper radiographic examination. This preparation is the first aspect of meditation. It’s aptly called calming the mind.
Calming the Mind
The age-old method of calming the mind is to take a retreat from daily activities, even if this is only 20 minutes a day. We use this time to practice gaining control of our monkey mind and replacing mental chatter with inner stillness. At first, this is not an easy task as we’ve been so accustomed to mental chatter. Our mind has been practicing busyness most of our life. So we begin by motivating our self. We do this by reminding our self over and over of the fact that we each have the opportunity for a very special and precious human existence. We can become far more that we are. The mind is not just a mental chatterbox. Once we tame and train the mind we progressively discover that it’s the source of a profound peace, happiness, wisdom, wholeness, and love. It’s the source of all we seek in life.
However, to achieve a fully lived life we must apply effort in that direction. And the window of opportunity does not last forever. If we do not prioritize inner development now when we have the opportunity, teachings, teachers, and a sound mind and body we may never actualize this possibility. The alternative to living a larger life is repeating throughout our lifetime the same mental chatter and mental habits. Without effort we will neither know nor experience the profound beauty and possibilities of life. We will live an “ordinary” or “normal” life, the usual diseases, aging and death. Keeping these thoughts in mind and reinforcing them regularly will motivate us to practice.
Meditation practice is a relatively standard technique that varies very little across time and diverse cultures. Calming the mind is accomplished by training it to focus on one thing at a time. This quiets the mind. So we pick a focal point. We generally choose as a focal point the movement of the breath as it’s experienced at the nostrils, chest, or abdomen. We settle on one or the other. We begin by assuming a straight and noble posture on a chair or cushion, closing our eyes or gently gazing downward, and taking 10 deep breaths imagining we are blowing out tension with the out-breath and taking in ease with the in-breath. We then place our awareness on the breathing cycle as noted above. We use a bit more mental tension in the beginning as to hold our attention but not too much that we become tense.
We now make use of two mental tools: mindfulness and vigilance. The first aides us in remember our focal point and the instructions. The second is a careful observer, noticing when our mind strays toward a random thought, feeling, or image. It takes time to develop these mental tools as we’ve become accustomed to “mindlessness” – being lost in one thought after another. So we strengthen and use these mental tools to stay with the breath, irrespective of how many times we need to bring our mind back from its tendency to wander.
How do we treat mental chatter – thoughts, feelings, or mental images that arise spontaneously? Whenever we experience our mind as wandering from the focal point we’re careful not to follow thoughts into the past, project them into the future or preoccupy our self with them in the present. We learn early on that the problem isn’t as much the mental movements but our chasing after them. If we just leave them alone they disappear by themselves like writing on water with ones finger.
We continue this practice until our practice period of about 20 minutes has been completed. We need to be careful not to bring our usual psychology into meditation practice. We don’t judge, grade, compare, or otherwise comment on our practice session. It’s what it is. We just follow the instructions and when there is a problem we seek guidance from a skilled instructor.
With time the mind will increasingly become still and we will experience brief periods in which we can let go of our focus on the breath and just rest and relax into the mind’s stillness. However, we still need to maintain a certain degree of mindfulness and vigilance although not as much as before, as the mental movements are more subtle and easier to deal with. This is called resting in stillness. If the mind becomes too active or you “drop off” you should return to the breathing practice to refocus yourself and renew your alertness. This practice can be done once or twice a day. At the beginning the practice sessions may be shorter. With time they will progress. Although discipline and commitment is essential you do not want to become frustrated. You want to enjoy and rest in the practice.
Because we are not seminarians and monks it’s important for us to use all of our daily activities as practice opportunities. I will mention here just two examples. The first is listening to others from inner stillness. Rather than our breathing, the words and speaking of the other becomes our focal point. We listen with full attention and whenever our mind wanders to a response, judgment, interpretation, or other commentary we note this with our mindfulness and vigilance and return to our focal point, open and focused listening. There is nothing to do and nothing to try to understand. There is only listening. This is one way we practice in our day-to-day life.
Another way is to begin the practice of bringing full attention to the task-at-hand. Whether tying our shoes, walking, eating, or brushing our teeth we use mindfulness and vigilance to return to and sustain our focal point – what’s happening here and now in the moment. This practice allows us to further strengthen mindfulness and vigilance as effective mental tools while simultaneously maintaining a calm mental state.
This is our first practice – calm abiding. It must be added here that as your experience progresses you will naturally note that there are certain conditions that cultivate a quiet mind – for example, serene surroundings, non-reactivity, mindfulness to the task-at-hand, and a loving and accepting mental attitude. There are other experiences that encourage mental chatter – for example, unnecessary conversations, endless busyness and multi-tasking. In time we learn to cultivate what supports inner calm and meditation practice and to abandon what obstructs our goal of a quieter and more stable inner life.
Gaining Insight
The second aspect of meditation is gaining insight. The purpose of gaining insight is to learn about the nature of the mind and ultimately the nature of reality itself. Once we have a correct understanding and experience of mind and reality we rid our self of the confusion and misunderstandings that lead to suffering and obscure the great treasures of human life. We cut the problems of human life at their root source – incorrect understanding leading to incorrect actions leading to mental distress.
We begin by gaining insight into the basic nature of the still and moving mind. Specifically, we gain an understanding of the transient and insubstantial nature of the thoughts, feelings, and images that are themselves the source of mental chatter, distress, and suffering. We then gain an understanding of the “I,” the personality self, that is a more complex thought pattern developed over time. And finally, we gain an understanding of the very nature of the mind and reality itself. This describes a progression of understanding moving from coarse to subtle to subtlest. This evolving wisdom cuts the roots of mental chatter and mental affliction, slowly reveals to us the nature of mind and reality, opening the way to an enduring happiness, wisdom and compassion.
Once we calm our mind we can actually observe it and learn how it works. The first thing we will notice is that most if not all of our mental chatter is troublesome. It’s disturbing and afflictive. We worry about the future and resent the past. We’re anxious, stressed, and moody. We follow our mental chatter mindlessly and then automatically act and speak it in the world, most often thoughtlessly. Our inner chatter is a major source of mental distress and suffering.
But there is more. We will also discover that what appears to be powerful and solid thoughts, feelings, and images that guide and compel our actions and speech are in actuality brief mental blips, neuro-electrical discharges. They’re actually not much of anything. When we stop chasing them and leave them alone they dissipate by themselves, leaving stillness in their wake. So what turns an innocuous mental movement into an experience of stress, distress, and anxiety? It’s not the thought, feeling, or image itself, but rather our mental habit of chasing after, attaching to, and identifying with one or more of these movements. Once we do this – and it occurs quite automatically – we now “become” the thought, feeling, or image and lose the stillness and awareness that enables us to stand back, observe it and allow the mental movement to naturally dissipate on its own.
There are two points here. The first is that we’ve developed the habit of automatically chasing after mental movements, attaching to and identifying with them, and then embellishing these mental blips with a story line from our past history. To this we add a value tone – we either like or dislike each particular mental movement. We make something out of nothing. And this something, this personal narrative runs our life whether we like it or not.
If we can stand back and observe these mental movements rather than get enmeshed in them we will discover a second important truth. The normal lifecycle of an “untouched” thought, feeling, or image is imperceptibly brief. Left alone they arise, abide, and fall back into awareness as immediately as the disappearance of the writing done with a finger on water. Taken together these two points teach us that in actuality mental movements are insubstantial. Through habit we mistakenly alter them by chasing after them and embellishing them beyond what they really are. We solidify, prolong, and empower what are no more that brief electrical discharges experienced as mental movements. And that’s how we drive our self “crazy.” That’s the nature of how we create afflictive emotions out of nothing.
Once we have an intellectual understanding of mental movements we can then observe them directly without analysis during meditation. That’s how we verify and gain certainty through experience what we’ve learned through intellectual understanding. Then, through personal experience gained in meditation, we know with clarity and certainty the truth about mental chatter and disturbing emotions. We see directly how mental activity comes and goes on its own leaving stillness in its wake. This will definitely alter our relationships to mental movements, disempowering them, and eventually freeing us from the suffering of mental discord. This takes time. So we must continually recollect our updated and accurate understanding of the busy mind and revalidate this knowledge again and again in practice.
We can also learn about the still mind. We notice directly during meditation that the still mind is open, spacious, transparent, non-obstructed by mental movements, peaceful and easeful. It will feel far more like your natural self than the usual mental chatter. You will also notice that with practice you can gain control of your mind and intentionally create and inner peace and ease.. At first this experience may be brief, but with time it will expand and stabilize. When you discover this you will know that this is a far more reliant and enduring source of happiness and peace than anything in the outer world. And although you may forget this inner home, this inner refuge – you can never lose it. It’s with you wherever you go. Discovering this inner source of comfort and ease is a very important moment. There is no longer the question of whether you can live in peace and happiness, but only the process of learning how to stabilize it.
So we have now gained insight into the nature of the still and moving mind. Of course this will develop and mature over time. So be patient each time you get caught in mental chatter. Moments of clarity and stillness will at first be brief, but with time these islands of rest and stillness will coagulate into larger land masses and become progressively more stable.
The second and more subtle source of insight is into the nature of the “I” or “Self.” This insight is essential, but difficult. Why is this insight so essential? To rid our life of suffering and gain the riches of human existence we must remove the causes of suffering and the obstructions to a larger life. Our mental habit of experiencing the personality “self” as a separate, independent, and solid entity is the cause of many of our difficulties. It leads to an excess of self-cherishing, self-protection, self-absorption, and disconnection from others To soften and eventually rid our life of this hardened sense of self is quite important. When we do so we also break the illusion of separateness and the resulting disturbing thoughts and emotions.
Let’s look at this self that we are so invested in. Ask the following questions. Does it have a shape? Does it have color? Does it have form? Is it inside our outside the body? If it’s inside the body where is it? Is it in our fingers, arms, legs, liver, head, or brain? Can we say that it is in one or all of the parts of the body? If it’s located in one part of the body, then where is it located? If alternatively it’s located in all of our parts would that mean we have many “selfs?” Is it located in the brain? If so in the right brain, left brain, nerve cells, or electrical discharges? Where exactly is it? Does it have matter? If you search and search and cannot find the self you’ve been successful. Our “I” can neither be located nor does it have mass. If the “I” cannot be located and it has no physical mass how can it be so powerful, so independent, so separate from others? It isn’t. We make it so because we falsely believe it’s autonomous, independent, and solidly existing. However, it does not exist the way it appears to us.
We can continue this analysis in many different ways and there are many scholarly books that do just that. But the point remains as we’ve stated it. The insight is that the “I” that we work so hard to assert and protect does not exist in the way that it appears. How does it actually exist? Using the mind and body as a basis we mentally impute or mentally make-up an “I.” This is a superimposition on mind and body. So this mental “I” does exist and function much as it does in a night dream. But it has no real existence other than the one we make-up mentally. It is neither substantial itself nor independent of its parts – mind and body. That’s why it disappears when the body deteriorates and dies. The “I” that we give our own name has no life of its own. It’s empty of essence and nature. It exists only as a mental creation based on mind and body.
That’s quite a bit for one paragraph. It will take time to slowly overcome our fixed sense of self. But we must not do this by completely denying the self, as it does exist. It just does not exist as it appears – independent, autonomous, solid, and separate. So don’t worry, you can hold onto it and use it to live life, but just allow it to soften and soften until your view of it is consistent with how it actually exists.
So this is our second major insight that again takes a long time to get accustomed to. Just understanding that it actually exists different than it appears is a major first step. As you read and study you will increasingly gain a correct view of the self and progressively free your self of the problems associated with this confusion. When resting in stillness during meditation you can observe that the “idea” of a separate, independent, and autonomous “I” is just another thought, another mental movement which will dissipate if you neither chase after nor identify with it. Through meditation you will increasingly and directly experience the transient and ephemeral nature of the “I” and this truth will dawn in your mind as a profound life-altering wisdom. Be patient. I am laying out a sequential process that evolves with study, reflection, and practice rather than suggesting that these increasingly subtle insights will come all at once.
We finally come to the third insight that is the subtlest of all. This insight is into the fundamental nature of the mind. As the mind is the source of all our experiences – mental experiences as well as sensory appearances – it is an insight that equally applies to all reality. It is here that we lose words. We can only gain this final insight through a direct intuitive knowing that goes beyond words and logic. We are now in the realm of poetry.
Once we’ve achieved a stable stillness of mind we can begin to “look” at the stillness itself to see its underlying nature. That underlying nature is the fundamental nature of mind. While resting and relaxing into stillness we drop the sense of a meditator, meditation practice, and the tools of mindfulness and vigilance that were previously needed to calm the mind. We’re now moving beyond any mental processes into the realm of pure presence and experience. We merely rest into the stillness and experience its nature. If we catch a glimpse of the nature of the mind it will only last a few seconds before we try to label and mentalize it. That’s OK. Be patient and in time these experiences will expand. Here are the instructions of the wise sage Tilopa:
To realize this inexpressible truth,
Do not manipulate mind or body
But simply open into transparency
With relaxed, natural grace –
Intellect at ease in silence,
Limbs at rest in stillness
Like hollow bamboos.
Neither breathing in nor breathing out
With the breath of habitual thinking,
Allow the mind to experience peace
In brilliant wakefulness.
When we directly experience the nature of the mind we will observe that it’s empty like space – this means it’s not cluttered by lingering thoughts, feelings, or images. It’s also spacious like space. It’s open, clear, and boundless. We can use one of many words or terms to express this open spaciousness. These include: timeless awareness, pure presence, naked awareness, empty awareness, ground of being, pure consciousness. Although there is nothing actually in this open awareness, paradoxically everything arises in it. This awareness can express itself in form as thoughts, feelings, images, or sensory appearances that arise from and then return to this basic awareness. There is no separateness. This is a continuous seamless flow of experience.
But there is also something else that is seamlessly inseparable from this space. This space has an intuitive knowing in it. It knows itself. It knows present moment awareness. It knows that mental appearances – thoughts, feelings, and images – come and go. It knows their nature to be awareness itself. By knowing the open and aware nature of mind it knows the nature of all reality.
Beyond this, and also seamlessly present, is a profound sense of peace, ease, oneness, and over time the development of a stable and penetrating wisdom, love and compassion. It’s with this most subtle and difficult recognition that we finally become completely and irreversibly free of suffering and open to receiving the blessings of the great gifts of the human experience.
We finally experience our consciousness as a continuous stream of open, free, and unconditioned awareness in which arises and falls the many forms of awareness that we call mental movements. Nothing sticks, all is insubstantial, and life takes on a present moment aliveness, vividness, presence, and beauty that many will call the authentic religious experience. It’s all really quite simple and ordinary. We are just resting in our natural state of awareness and experiencing the continuous flow of life as it is. Paradoxically, in the East they call this the ordinary mind.
Here are the words the wise teacher Shakbar used to describe this ultimate insight and reality.
Not knowing that this state is within oneself,
How amazing that one searches for it elsewhere!
Although it is clearly manifest, like the radiant disc of the sun,
How amazing that so few people see it.
How amazing that without being fabricated,
This mind, which is unborn and primordially pure,
Is spontaneously present from the beginning.
This self awareness is naturally free from the very first,
How amazing it is liberated by just resting –
At ease in whatever happens.
When you directly perceive the luminosity of your mind,
There is no reasons to listen to theories about it.
When you have molasses right on your tongue,
You don’t need to be told how it tastes.
It is present as transparent, utter openness,
Without outside – without inside –
An all-pervasiveness
Without boundary and without direction. –
…like the sky …like space:
Without center, without edge, without goal.
The Fruition – The Wish-Fulfilling Gem
As we’ve said, it’s all so simple. At the end of the path we return with well deserved wisdom to where we started – an open and vast awareness and presence in life that is uncontaminated by the residue of past history or the shaping forces of future projections. That is where we start our lives as young children. But as the world closes down on us we retreat into intellect, doing, achievement, and other worldly endeavors, leaving behind our natural home. Although the path we’ve discussed is a homecoming it doesn’t take us back in the same way we left it. As a child we experience but are ignorant of the beauty and splendor of the present moment. As an adult we re-experience this beauty and presence but our time on the path has graced us with the wisdom to know who and what we actually are. We learn to live in this center of our being with great awareness and grace. We live from the inside out. We are masters of both worlds – inner and outer.
Once we return to the center of our being we discover the wish-fulfilling gem that awaits us. What is this wish-fulfilling gem? It’s no more and no less than our natural presence, our natural home. What wishes are fulfilled? We find over time that this center of our being, this essence of who and what we are is inseparable, as water is from wetness, from the great gifts in life. They arrive in a single package and are revealed to us sequentially to the extent that we can live in this space of open mind and open heart. First is a peace and ease that surpasses anything we have known. It’s not relaxation. It has no opposite. It has no real name. Everything is just as it should be. There is no fear, no hope, no needs, and no desires. The experience of being itself is the ultimate elixir of peace.
This profound sense of peace is pervaded by an equally profound contentment and happiness. We cannot compare this to what we call happiness/pleasure. It is permanent, abundant, and experienced in body, mind, and spirit. We have all glimpsed moments, or perhaps better said facsimiles of such peace and happiness. So remember such a moment and then imagine you can stretch in out so it’s your entire life. That will give you an idea of what’s possible.
And there is more – a profound wisdom. When we are cleared of the veils of mental habits we can “see” and experience clearly for the first time. We see our self and our world as is not as constructed by our overactive mental life. To see what is as is is to know the truth of all things. To know the truth of reality is to be freed of delusions, confusion, and the distress and suffering that follows. To know the truth is to live in the peace and happiness we have spoken of. To know the truth is to know a profound wisdom that cuts through all falsehoods and re-connects us to the essence of our life and all life.
And as we shall discover, our natural state of awareness, presence, and being is seamlessly connected to all of life. It was only the cognitive mind and its labeling and fabrications that created the illusion of separateness – I and other and I and it. That’s the way life appears, but it’s not the way it actually is. Life is a seamlessly inter-connected whole. There is no disconnection, no separation, no isolation, and no aloneness. There is only the wholeness that was always there.
Our natural awareness and presence is the wish-fulfilling gem because it brings us the gifts we’ve longed for but inadvertently searched for in the wrong places. Now we know that these great human gifts are in actuality innate to human existence. We do not need to search outside of our self. They are right here right now. We only need to look in the right direction. We are finally home – and what a homecoming.
We may fairly ask why do we have to go through this long journey of questioning, study, and practice to return to what has always been there? It is hard to give a precise answer so it is best to return again to the great stories. Whether it is Odysseus, Oedipus, Dante, Parsifal, or King Lear the message is the same. We get lost and we cannot return home through the same door through which we left. We must first gain a larger vision and view, and then through intention, study, reflection and practice realize this great vision. When we do so we will live under the guidance of an unconditioned wisdom and unconditional heart. Perhaps we an also call this heaven.
In the words of the poet Derek Walcott:
There will come a time when with elation
You will greet yourself arriving at your own door:
In your own mirror
And each will smile at the other’s welcome
And say, sit here, eat.
You will love again the stranger who was yourself.
Give wine, give bread.
Give back your heart to itself,
to the stranger who has loved you all your life,
Whom you ignored for another,
Who knows you by heart.
www.elliottdacher.org
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